GNOME Takes Over KDE
KDE, the popular desktop environment known for its modern interface and powerful configuration options, was taken over by the GNOME Foundation.
“We will completely rewrite KDE to conform with GNOME User Interface Guidelines. We will strip all the unnecessary options, remove the plasmoids, the panel and the menu from KDE.”
GNOME spokesman said. He also added:
“We already have a team of developers hard at work on removing all unnecessary code from KDE, port it to GTK and keep only the basic applications. The login manager will only have one text entry now: the username (supplying a password may confuse users so we decided to remove it).”
In a sudden move which left the entire Linux community perplexed…
Windows 8 to Be Open-Sourced
According to an announcement by a Microsoft official, Windows 8 has been open-sourced. “Our user base is dropping and dropping from day to day. We finally came to see the light, and decided on open-sourcing our entire operating system. We know the open-source model is the future, and we are committed at improving it, while at the same time implementing a business model used successfully by so many others.”
Unfortunately, after only one hour within the release of the source code, made publicly available on GitHub, a number of ten thousand bugs have been reported, and a number of some twenty million machines in the entire world have been reported as breached. This also came to the collapse of almost all the major websites running the Windows Server OS.
We didn’t see this coming. We are currently working hard at eliminating the bugs, but for each fixed bug, ten others are reported.
Will the giant from Redmond collapse under such heavy difficulties?
As a side note, Richard Stallman, the creator and leader of the GNU movement and philosophy, accepted the news with a grave, yet somewhat satisfied attitude. “There are still some freedom issues in Windows, and until that doesn’t get solved I cannot start recommending it.”, Mr. Stallman said.
In other news…
Linus on the Move
The community is shocked by the recent development of the situation regarding the direction of the Linux kernel, when Linus Torvalds, creator of the Linux Kernel, decided to work for Microsoft and ditch Linux development: “It’s time to switch”, bluntly explained Linus in an interview for a well-renowned Linux news site.
Wesnoth to Be Published on Steam
Battle for Wesnoth, the popular strategy game, will come to Steam this summer, switching to an additional purchases model. Only paying users who will gain premium status will have access to the more powerful units in the game. As such, “units like the Loyalist Horseman or the Orcish Assassin will not be available for recruiting to normal users”, one of the developers says. As an added bonus, only the tutorial is available for single-player, while the campaigns and access to add-ons are now reserved to the privileged users who have a paid account.
“We believe the cash flow will greatly help future development of Wesnoth, and we think online playing is enough for the free accounts. Besides, nobody ever said you can’t win a game playing Loyalists without Horsemen or Heavy Infantry guys.”
The available factions still have at least three units for free accounts.
“There was a debate on whether we should make Bats available only for the paid version – they steal villages you know, and such advantage should only be given to our most trusty users – but finally we decided on leaving them alone – Undead are too crippled anyway.”
Note: This is a pamphlet and should be treated as such. Information provided here is not accurate.